These Words Are My Own (like 'em, or lump 'em)

I think I've found the meaning of life. The meaning of life is that everyone's life has its OWN meaning, and we have to discover it, and fulfill it. What, you didn't think the answer would be THAT simple, did you? The hard part is finding your purpose, your nitch, and living it. Do what you love, love what you do, and love every minute of it.

And here's a continuation on another thought I once posted. The thing with afterlife, I think, is this: when you die, your mind and body will cease to be... they'll be reabsorbed back into this physical world. Your soul doesn't; it's reabsorbed back into a greater whole. Your mind is that which connects the two. It's what gives you hints at what your life was like, or what you were like, or how you should have been.

I love it when things come together, naturally, on their own.

Many people seek out religion to fill a void in their life. But it's not like that. That only leaves me later feeling like I'm a square, crammed into a circular box, or something. I wasn't planning to seek out spirituality; it just found me, when the time was right. I had to become comfortable and confident with who I am, first. But I'm not seeking religion. Spirituality, to me, is entirely different. Rituals and practices are all great, but they're not what make people in tune with the spirit world. Some people need them to attune their thoughts, and that's fine. I just see such a division between needing to/having to, and just wanting to, because it's a way to celebrate how you feel. It's like going to church all the time, but you could only just say you were physically there, making the motions, but were not really being in tune with God.

On a related note, I watched the Mists of Avalon the night before last. I have been tempted to read the copy of my book, or watch the movie, so many times before, but for some reason I never did. Now I know why! It was not time. I had no idea about its Neo-pagan storyline that runs alongside the Camelot one. I always thought it was just about Camelot. Wow, was I pleasantly surprised! But more so at how I just felt the time was right. You have to learn to trust your insticts. I've said that for years.

One last thought that decided to spew out of my head (eww) while I was writing. :) When it comes to religion, I honestly feel that it doesn't matter what you believe, as long as you truly believe in something, and believe that it's right. If you just refuse to acknowledge or think about it or pretend to be something you're not, then you probably really haven't thought about it. If you have, then you're doing good. If you believe in accountability, then this should fit: I don't think you could ever be held accountable for believing in something and holding to it firmly, if you were mistakenly born into the wrong religion, lead down a different path, etc. You did what you thought was right, based on your life experiences, personal knowledge, and research of the various possibilities.

It's not just the little things

My last post was rather fragmented, and unfinished. This one might be too, but none the less, it's a continuation of the last:

It's not just the little things, either. I don't feel that we should live our lives to give up things, wait for some greater fate to guide our actions, or live in constant regret and apologies. I have said, for a long time, "Live or be lived." "Drive, or be driven." Are you in control of your own life? I accept that I have the ability to shape and form my own life and future, into whatever I want it to be.

I accept that there is just as much life and spirit in a plant, as there is an animals. For this reason, you won't ever find me as a vegeterian or vegan. I am just as thankful for every plant that I consume, as I am animals, because of the life within each. Haven't you ever marveled at the wonder of plant life? Didn't you ever sprout one of those little butter beans in a cup in grade school? Well, if you weren't too bogged down in memorizing all of the plant parts, you, like me, may have been fascinated at the life that springs fourth from that little seed into a plant, and the cycle of life that ensues thereafter. I love the trees, and the grass. They smell good. They feel good. They have a different kind of life than animals, but special none the less. Even water is a miracle. Aren't you grateful for a glass of that which our bodies are primarily composed of when you're thirsty?

Making a Choice to Move Forward

I want to write now about why it is that I think I am/want to be/should be a Wiccan. Sometimes I start to read books and things and start hearing the name Witchcraft, and start thinking about spells and circles and things, and my head begins to spin. So I like to stop and look at why I am looking.

First of all, obviously it's a lot more than rituals and practices. It's a way of life and a spirituality from within. When I look at what it means to be Wiccan, I feel that I already am.

I have always had a sense of consciousness about the earth and nature around me. I have always enjoyed being outdoors because of the feeling I get, and being around plants and animals. Sometimes I wonder if, as a kid, I would have been happier as a trout in a stream because I loved playing in the water and the dirt in the backyard (the ditch became a wonderful 'stream" after big rains!). In fact the only lifestyle change I have felt compelled to make was to begin recycling. It has always bothered me a lot *not* to, and I have not been able to find anywhere locally to take recyclables to. But I decided that it didn't matter - even if it means occasional inconvenience, I was going to start doing it, and afterwards I found a place that has begun taking collections locally! I couldn't be happier.

I had already began to consider alternate possibilities (from those which I was taught originally) such as life returning to the earth upon death, feeding back the knowlege we gained while here and going on to some other purpose. In fact the movie Final Fantasy: The Spirits Within really made me think about this a lot. I have never seen ghosts or experienced spirits, but others claim they have, and though I'd have to see to know and understand what it was like, I don't discount things of this nature. I don't begin to claim to understand why or how, but I accept that it is true, at least, that spirits exist in this realm, sometimes. I feel there is a lot that we will never know until after our life here ends, and aren't meant to necessarily, though we have our own opinions that probably aren't far from the truth. I do most certaily feel that there is something beyond our life here and now. Life itself is too much of a mirical to be a freak accidental placement by some big boom. Maybe the planets got here in a big boom - who knows how deity would create? I don't think I *need* to know or understand that. But the delicate, intricate, extraordinary creations upon our planet, our very planet itself, and our planet's place in the universe, to me, were unmistakably set into place by something greater than and beyond myself. So, I feel the call to this something, and I call it deity.

It's hard to consider this, when your first place to try and build fundamentals is in a Christian church, but I have felt for quit some time that the Bible is not necessarily the best source for information. I'm sure it was a divinely inspired book, and that it may still hold many truths, but men are prone to corruption, and I am sure that governments, kings, and men over the course of time caused words within this book to become astray. Besides that, times have changed, and it has not. So I think it should be taken with a grain of salt... or several. I don't like the idea that I should base my religion on a writing that man wrote. I feel the truths should come from within, after exploring and experiencing on your own.

Like anything in life, it takes the contrast between various things to come to your own conclusions. Accepting the defalts you are given, without thought or regard to other options, is the result of either not knowing, or not caring. Now that I know other avenues of spirituality, I could not possibly stay upon the same one I used to be on.

I find that, in the things I have been reading, that the basic fundamentals are the closest thus far to how I feel. I still have some things to think over, of course, to find what feels right to me, but I feel as though I have already been on this path for several years and just didn't know I was heading here. But, that's usually the way things happen, isn't it? What matters is to know where you want to be, and to work towards being there.

A Beautiful Moon

couldn't help but notice tonight how much the moon, large and golden, resembled the sun. At one point the clouds drifted past it in such a way to make it look even more so. A symbolic moment I captured on camera, though it really looks like crap. ;) All the same, wanted to post it to remember.


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Amazing things right in the back yard

I took 1/2 day off work today to go get my toe X-rayed. I whacked it last week and it still hurts. I've figured it was just bruised and didn't want to sound like a whiny cry-baby, but 10 days later and still tender to the touch, so I wanted to be sure. I don't like to take chances with my health or body.

So, I had the afternoon off.. whee!! Luckily for me, they were actually on time *gasp* or even early at the doc (shocking, I know!) and it's less than 2 miles from home, soooooo.... I have had time to do all those things that you know you put on the "I will do this when I get time someday" list, but are always too tired or busy to do. My pets are well tended today, lol! And I went out and around my house a bit because the temp was so nice today and I found the most excellent little nook I never even thought about exploring! I've been back there before, but never *in* there....

Then I found another little treasure in my front yard, hovering around the pond. A dragonfly! :D! I adore them so. It's not the first time I've seen one around there, but I was able to go out and snap some pics today. I even found a couple to add to my Scenic Gallery. :D



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Just to show you how close this is to my house, lol. And for size perspective.

And if you care to see what lies beyond my little nestled island of trees that almost makes me feel like I'm in the woods, click here and go to the last pic that shows the lastest construction monstrosity. :P


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A co-worker nick-named me Sunshine today. *giggles*

the end!

Ritualistic and Overstated, or Simplistic and Meaningful

I have been reading Cunningham, who puts things in a much more simple, down-to earth (so to speak) manner that got me to thinking, again. Now this is another one of my neophyte opinions, but bear with me, if you will. Another matter of much contention, from my bird's eye point of view, is that between the Coven Witch, and that of the Solitary Witch. Covens appear to believe that those on a solitary path aren't really following the real path. I guess you could compare it to how in Christianity, some feel you haven't truly accepted Jesus as your savior until you get baptised. Those Wiccans do not feel that the Wiccan solitaire is truly a Witch until they have accepted a certain path or following. To me this sounds too much like other organized church conventions that drove me away from them in the first place. I don't want to think that just because I don't do it one way, that means I'm doing it the wrong way. I also don't want to think that anyone can do anything at all they very well please and be doing everything right. Each person knows if they're doing what they feel called to do or not. But the under-educated person may be doing what they *think* is right just because they do not know enough yet. So I can see both perspectives. But the thing with Wicca is that it is no longer in the "broomcloset." It's right out there on every town's corner, right there in the bookshop on the shelves in that cute little section back behind all the other religion books, on the internet when you hop into the book shopping section, and a multitude of other learning sources I have yet to discover. It's not a big secret. You don't have to be in a coven to know the spiritual meaning that Deity wish to convey to you. But let me also say this, in the same thought's wave. In people, no matter what religion, it takes more to help some attune themselves to spirituality. For me personally, I feel that so much gets lost into the religion, and that the spiritual feelings are then not as strong, when one filters their spiritual life through so many big ceremonial rituals. This is why I never went to church when I was still trying to be a Christian. What they had to sell me wasn't what was in my head. But, I knew when I listened from within. You do have to take in enough information from the outside in order to form your own opinions and thoughts, and know how you feel. It does take some contrast in order to find the right definition. But for me, it takes a little less than it does for others. :)

The Goddess and the God

In all the "vast" (I say in jest) sum of my neophyte knowledge, I have a few thoughts to share. Actually, I often feel that someone who has not yet become fully immersed in any one path of anything, but has some knowledge, can have a lot of perspective on things that may otherwise have already become influenced by other factors in many. And.. some thoughts may be way off the path. ;) Either way, here are mine.

This subject seems to be a matter of contention amongst Wiccan readings that I have come across thus far. In the beginning, I read that both the Goddess and the God are really more of two aspects that represent one, sometimes referred to as "the All." I think this can be both confusing, and misleading. Humans were created in the image of deity, and this is of both female and male form. The two, put together, do make a whole. In the beginning, I took this to mean that the two were more like aspects of the one: it really seems to be an easier, more palpable way for the human mind, especially that of a newcomer, to get a grasp on duality when it comes to their God. But if the two form one whole, then really, those two halves are it: there IS no seperate one who these two represent. They are it.

Independance, Indeed.

I guess you could say that right now, I am a Seeker.

I found Wicca somehow after finally deciding it was time to satisfy the curiosity I've had about what it is. It is said that things happen when they should, and this was the case. It wasn't until recently that I finally decided to put together the ideas that I have come to believe throughout my life, on my own, through hearing thoughts of others, listening to what a few different Christan churches had to say to me, and listening to what I feel to be true.

I know that a person can't just ad-lib and make up faith as it suits them in their current life just because it's convenient. To do so would really not be following a religion at all. This is one reason why I feel it is important for me to identify with a religion again, and not just remain in a spiritual only, non-religious state as I have been, now that I feel I have found what speaks the truth to me. Also, I feel that it may not matter so much, in the greater scheme of things, if what we believe is 100% correct, because with so many paths to follow, how could only 1 be right and all the rest wrong? I think that what truly matters is that we seek for what feels the most right, and we adhere to it, and we truly live it and be it.

This path is the closest thing that seems to match what I feel. I believe the spirit of deity is within every person, and every living thing, and that spirit returning to the greater whole upon death. I really was not certain about the whole God/Goddess idea until more came to me. Humans were created in the image of God (and in saying God I mean as in the All). A man or a woman alone are really not complete without their mate to make them whole, down to their very souls (I can feel this one for myself). Therefore, I conclude that we constitute both the male and female aspect of God, the Lord and the Lady. The Father and the Mother. The Lord God our father, and Mother Nature herself, the Goddess of life. Also in regards to the bible, I am sure that it was written by an inspired hand and mind, but I sense much corruption of what the book may have originally said, by corrupt men and governments who intended to control and instill malleability and fear of not doing as instructed into people. I feel there are many outdated things -- it's actually safe to eat pork now, for example, thanks to the modern world's inventions -- and it can't all be followed as literally as it is, so I cannot follow a religion who follows this text in whole without leaving any room for question or doubt. Translations and who knows what else changed words over time before the integrity of data was protected in such ways as it is now (presumably).

These are my thoughts for the moment. It feels nice to be free of mind and spirit. I am thankful to be able to go out and buy books on alternate ideas such as these to learn from. I have a lot of reading to do, so goodnight! :) Time to go hit a chapter, or three.

Deity

The author of Wicca for the Rest of Us stated, (copy/paste of some highlights I want to ponder further)

"Wicca does not have a set pantheon.

Some Wiccans simply call their deities God and Goddess. Others invoke specific aspects from mythology. Some honor pantheons while others dedicate themselves to only a few. This is because the Divine can take upon itself infinite aspects and faces.

Following a god of a particular pantheon does NOT mean you are following their religion.

Know your gods, both in meditation and in study. Do not just go off books that list hundreds of deities with a couple sentences of explanation. This is an important reason for keeping to a limited number of deities - it allows a reasonable scope for study.

How you "see" your deities may or may not be how they actually exist. For example, I envision my god and goddess in distinctly human forms, and I see no problem with that. I simply believe that is not their true existence. It's very hard for most humans to form a relationship with something they think of as a big blob of divinity. But I, personally, really can't believe that the gods are actually confined to "bodies" that have two arms, two legs, and a head. Especially since they don't actually even have physical bodies. But we do tend to relate to them through such imagery."

I took an online Chakra test.

Your most positive energy is flowing from your Third Chakra

This chakra is located in your solar plexus, which is just below the breastbone. The third chakra represents one's ability to honor and accept the self. In your case, this chakra appears to be clear and unblocked so that positive energy can flow from it freely. Radiating positive energy from your third chakra indicates that you've cultivated higher wisdom concerning the important life lessons associated with this energy center. You're apt to treat yourself with kindness. You're also likely to forgive your mistakes rather than dwell on them unnecessarily.

Whether they're allowing positive energy to flow or preventing it from doing so, all seven of your body's chakras contribute to how you are feeling on a day-to-day basis. When they're balanced, you feel energized and at the top of your game. When they're unbalanced, you may feel tired or 'off'.

Finding A Name

I am having a hard time choosing a name to use. I want to use something which relates to my real last name's derivative, which broken down is Willow Ford. I am particularly fond of wisteria, mermaids and water, and for some reason raven keeps coming to mind, though in person the crow is really the bird I admire (I've never really been around ravens enough to know if I'd feel the same; only read about them). I am particularly fond of cats, but don't care to have anything feline related to my name.

Some notes:
‘Willow’ originates from the Anglo-Saxon ‘welig’ meaning pliancy.

In legend, the willow was regarded as the tree of enchantment. As the moon affected the tides, so the waterside willow became associated with the moon and its worship. It was used to bind the birch twigs to the ash stake on a witch’s broom and its medicinal properties and religious associations led to the name, ‘witch’s tree’. Paradoxically it was brought into the home to guard against evil. The Druids cut magical wands from goat willow to use as protective charms.

‘Burn not the willow, a tree sacred to poets’ The Song of the Forest Trees.
Supposedly Orpheus received his poetic gifts because he carried willow branches through the Underworld.

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Edit, July 6th. I think I will just stick with my online "handle" of Mermaiden. I have felt drawn to that name for enough reasons for this long, that there's no reason it should not stick now. I really don't need any reason to keep my religious preferences seperated from my regular online life. Offline might be a different story: I live in a place where people are very closed minded, lol. :X

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[Jun. 20th, 2006|06:07 pm]

Why Mermaiden?

I envision, much like my namesake (RL not online), a stream or a ford beneath an embedment of willow trees. My favorite colors, those of the ocean, and vibrant green leaves against a blue sky, surround the area. It is misty, and overcast, perhaps after a recent rain when the rich scents of the earth fill the air and the mild temperate climate caresses the skin. It is late spring; the wind is warm, but underneath the cool shade of the trees the wisteria is still in full bloom. A maiden by day, living beside the stream and the rocks, admiring the beauty of the surroundings, and a mermaid by night... legs dangling in the water, becoming one with it.

The ocean itself holds just as much beauty and wonder, yet is more violent at times. The stream is delicate and gentle, and subtly forceful within. The current is ever-changing, yet always there and the same.

I've never really thought about all of these things in one place at one time until I began to search why my mind produced the name Mermaiden for myself several years ago. It's like other thoughts that are in my mind, as well. They all came to surface in my conscious mind when I wanted them to. I wasn't ready to know before, but I understood and knew the time would come.

Oh no, here she goes about religious stuff

It didn't take me 30 years to decide that I never go with the default options given to me. It didn't take me this long to realize that my religious beliefs have always differed from those around me and those taught to me, and I have always questioned them, because why should the first thing I'm taught in life necessarily be the correct thing? Only people who have a narrow frame of mind, who never realize they have -- and can take -- the initiative to branch out in their thoughts, imho, stick to the defaults. Either that, or they just don't really care for whatever reason. It's different if you explore the possibilities of your options, and decide that something really is right for you.

But that's not what's happened for me. My parents sent me to a Baptist church. It didn't take me long to feel that I couldn't possibly stay bound to the title of "Baptist." "Christian" seemed more appropriate. There is a lot I have thought about through the years as I drifted in and out of things, and that I have recently wrote about to myself that I finally decided I had thought about for long enough, put together enough opinions, and etc., that I couldn't live with my old title anymore, either, as loosely as attached to it as I was. There was no particular action, thought, or other prompt that has lead me to this path. In fact, I find it really frustrating when people latch onto something just because it sounded cool, someone they know did, or it's the next best thing to come along. I feel that you really have to pool together all your resources and come to the culmination of your beliefs: the ones that you feel in your heart, and know in your mind, to be true and right for you.

And I don't know if I am ready to be bound by a new label. But then again, why does anyone seek out their beliefs, if not to put their energies into them and focus on them? "Physical form is ephemeral, and a basic religious impulse is to seek the permanent which is unaffected by change."

Profound thought for the week

The mind is the link between the body and the soul.

Learn to listen to all three...

Religion

Interesting. My results have changed again... I took one of those little online quizzes, because my mind has been aswirl as of late in putting together a lot of thoughts that make so much sense to me right now, in how they've made so little sense for so long. Does that make any sense? :X

According to the SelectSmart.com Belief System Selector, my #1 belief match is Neo-Pagan. What do you believe? Visit SelectSmart.com/RELIGION

Blah Blah Blah

Do you feel like you're in control of your own world, or that the world is in control of you?

Your answer to this question says a lot about your perspective and outlook on life. It might also say a lot about your karma, if you believe in such things.

Do what you do, and do it well.

We all have insecurities. But it is up to each of us to overcome these issues, and live for the rest of the positive ones.

You can find inner peace; it is right inside of you! All you have to do is seek it out, and it will come fourth for you. When all you have to do is close your eyes and exhale slowly in order to feel relaxed and enjoy a clear mind, you will know you have found it.

Let go of your worries. They won't let go for you. They will hold onto you, for as long as you hold onto them. Live and let live. Worrying won't change things: action will. Decide what things really bother you, and plan a course of action on how to cope or deal with them, or on what you could do to make positive changes to make the negatives more positive for you. Go out and live your life: don't let it live you! It's amazing what even small things can do to create a huge impact on your life, your mood, and your outlook on your daily life as well as long-term.

Something close to religious or spiritual

This post was moved here from my old Livejournal. Some updated points are in italics.

Why do people put their hands over their hearts when they pledge allegiance?

I have what I might consider to be a rather unique theory on a religious perspective, and I wanted to put it down in writing. Why? Because I think it's a very good theory, and I don't want any other factors in life to influence it in its raw form right now, while it's fresh on my mind.

I was raised in the South, around Southern Baptists. That's right - right in the middle of the bible belt. My family didn't necessarily go to church, but they always encouraged me to at least go to Sunday school, which I did. I did some bible reading. Eventually I started attending church services, where I sat and listened and took things in. I went to a couple of friends' churches, one being of a non-denominational basis, the other another Baptist, but each with their own perspectives on things. I read and observed from others around me, as I tend to do, and have pieced things together in ways that made sense to me, and felt right to me.

There are so many religions in the world. Who can say which is truly right and which is wrong? Most of us believe that which we were taught in our upbringing, or that which influenced us the most strongly when we learned about it. Does that mean that others around the world are wrong because they did the same things, yet ended up believing in what may a totally opposite religion than your own? I think not.

I'm not going to talk about the bible much, or any other religious books or teachings. I'm not a scholar, nor have I studied biblical histories. But I will say this. I do feel there are some divine words in those pages, but they were written by man, and man is prone to errors, opinions, and personal missions. I don't doubt that governing bodies influenced words that were driven into the minds of the masses in order to impose control.
I know it's said that it's proven that the bible is still basically as it was originally written, even after all the translations and such. But still, it was written by man at the time it was written.
I feel that I can read the words handed down from generation to generation, and take what words of wisdom I can from it, and combine them with my own knowledge and experience, to make a better way: one that is true for myself.

I hate it when people just latch hold of something religions because they can't explain it, just because they want to continue to believe it, or are too afraid to stop believing it.
How did our delicate cycle of life on this planet come to be as it is? From the result of what? I don't know, and feel that maybe I'm not meant to know, the answer to so many questions. But I just can't see how delicate, beautiful flowers or exotic tropical creatures, just for examples of life, could have begun this process except for some reason divine.

I don't think people were meant to ever fully understand the spiritual realm, nor that we ever really will. I do believe there is such a thing. I find it to be a miraculous event that life as we know it came into existence and that the universe down to the very world we live in hangs in such perfect yet precarious balance. I don't think things like this occurred out of some random chance. I believe there was some meaning, some purposeful creation, or some greater being(s) responsible for all. I can hardly fathom the infinite expanse known as space, much less begin to wonder how it got there. I feel that if I ever need to know, I'll find out.

I don't necessarily feel that everything hangs in balance due to some divine intervention; the world revolves and evolves of its own accord, because everything in it is created of the divine. Nature balances itself. When I sometimes say everything happens for a reason, it's not always meant as something karmic in meaning: things do certainly happen in reaction to other things happening.

Up to this point have been my opinions and viewpoints to lead you to this theory. Now for the theory itself. What if, what if.

What if there isn't a "heaven" or a "hell," and that the Gaia theory holds some truth? Well, from the same perspective as that Final Fantasy movie depicted. This theory http://www.oceansonline.com/gaiaho.htm is a bit more hefty of reading than I care to delve into. Let's keep it simple, here.

I like the name "God" for whatever it is that is greater than me, that through some eventually, put me here on this earth.

I think there is a good possibility that when your life "flashes before your eyes" when you die, it's passing by more than just your own eyes. This could be when you pass on all the knowledge and experiences throughout your life back into the spirit from which you came. Every moment, recorded, played back just like a movie, to be absorbed, analyzed, and ... well, I really don't know what else. I'm not God! Maybe it's used to help perfect "karma," where you could have been a better person if you didn't have this flaw, or that. Maybe the millions of combinations of people and personalities help construct a growing knowledge and understanding of the human capacity. I know that's true for each of us individually, at least. Can you imagine how many years it would take to see just how advanced we can become, and to learn all there is to learn? I don't think I was meant to understand it all. For all I can guess, maybe this knowledge will help make a better race on some other side of the universe, or something weird like that. (Where do you think all the inspirations for those sci-fi movies come from?)

Wow, that was a meander. Anyway, when people state that God is omnipotent, have you ever stopped to wonder how? Well, perhaps that's how.

I have always been skeptical about the idea that people are rewarded or punished based on their deeds. I think people drive their own life, and that we are influenced by other people and surroundings to arrive at where we are. But people are like sheep: they need something for guidance and assuredness, so they have become comfortable with the not quite tangible, yet solid view they have of a God.

I think that maybe, just maybe, each and every person has a little bit of God (or the spirit of the world or whatever it is) within them. When people pray for guidance, they are really focusing within on that which they have been given (a reason why might some people say that everyone has a little bit of God in them). When you close your eyes and meditate or focus and listen for answers, sure - maybe they're divine. But I don't think they zap down out of the sky into your mind, or anything telepathic. I think the answers are right there within your own mind, and have been the whole time. It's that inner voice. It's your soul. It's the spirit within each one of us. When you seek answers, this is where they come from. They are banked there, and perhaps your "soul" contains the wisdom of ages and you just don't know it. When you shut up and listen, sometimes you learn a lot.

Focused Muscle Relaxation

I got so frustrated at my dad 2 nights ago that I told him he needed to learn how to relax. I was shocked and amazed that he didn't take it poorly. I know he has no clue how to do it, so when I came across a health tip on the Human Resources website at work today, it reminded me of this and I decided to do a little search. It lead me into some great articles at About.com that I'm printing off to give him. One section on Progressive Muscle Relaxation seemed to be lacking and I have better advice to offer, so I typed up the following. Rather than just delete the document when done with it, I thought I'd just paste my own little snippet below, for fun. :P Yes, yes.. I know... I have "fun" writing up help guides and documentation... sheesh, what is this world coming to... *snickers*

No, you don't have to do Yoga to gain all of the benefits. You too can do simple
Relaxation Technique
from home, at the office, or anytime, anywhere!

With practice, you can will your body to relax, just by the power of your mind. Close your eyes and sit, stand, or lie comfortably depending on where you are (you can do this anytime, and anywhere you happen to be). Exhale a long, slow breath, concentrating on clearing your mind and focusing on the task of deliberate relaxation. Then, begin focusing your concentration on your physical body, starting at the very top of your head, and rolling down, through the muscles in your face, lips, jaws, neck, etc., making a conscious effort to release any strainful position you may be holding onto, and relax all your muscles. Move your way down through your shoulders, arms, and hands. Then move down your chest, abdomen, stomach, and continue on down through your legs, to your feet. By the time you reach the bottom, every muscle in your body should be at ease, providing you with the perfect opportunity for relaxation.

By this point, you are now meditating, and you didn’t even know it yet! If you can sit still with a clear, relaxed mind like this for several minutes with your eyes closed, you will open them and feel refreshed and renewed, and free from stress.

Now, after you have achieved complete relaxation of the body, relax your mind. Focus on nothing. If you find that random thoughts enter your mind, acknowledge this, then let them go again to clear your mind entirely. This may be easier to do while listening to soft, relaxing (particularly wordless) music.

Try this anytime you feel tension beginning to build up. It is easy to clench your muscles and cause physical stress to your body – doing this can alleviate headaches, shoulder pains, and stomach, leg, or arm cramps, even, as well as a multitude of other stressful pains and tensions.

What is this, some kind of calendar advice for the year or something!?

Just get to the point. Cut to the chase; get past the filler; what's the bottom line? A clear understanding gives better perspective on any situation, and less room for misinterpretation, false assumptions, overexpectations, and the like. Knowledge is the key. Find out what you're working with first, then everything else can fall into place.

Why ask why? To better understand. Don't be afraid to ask rather than assume.

You can learn a lot without ever even asking. Just listen once in a while. And this doesn't always mean to listen with just your ears.

What is life without love? Merely existance as an incomplete half of a whole. Learn to love, and to be loved. Life, shared, is so much more fulfilling.

Drive or be driven. Live life, or let it live you. Don't be afraid to take the initiative and make changes. If you don't knock on opportunity's door, it sure won't come walking up to yours and put a free lottery check in your hand out of the blue. Do what you know you need to do.

Listen to your instincts; they're usually right. Learn to trust them. Your little inner voice knows experiences and knowledge your conscious mind may be too busy or stubborn to listen to sometimes, but your subconscious mind won't let you forget. Don't ignore what you know you should listen to.

Sometimes, you need to just open up your mind and heart, walk blindly into the future on a tightrope through a black hole, and then lend your attention to your experiences and knowledge: they will guide you forward if you let them, and nothing else will matter. If you set your sights on a goal, focus on it and work towards it consistently, you'll get there. It takes faith that you can obtain whatever you set your mind to, persistance even when it's tough, and taking the initiative to conquer whatever obstacles are between you and your goal. Every human is capable of this, but not every one is willing to believe it or do what is necessary. Live life, or let it live you? The choice is yours. Life is what you make it.

Learn from your experiences. Every situation in life presents an opportunity to learn something, either about yourself or others. You don't have to experience every situation to learn from it, either; just be observant, and pay attention to those around you, and their lives too. Learning about others teaches one much about themselves sometimes, too.

Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. What goes around comes around. If you're selfish and unyielding, chances are you'll miss out on receiving just as much as you fail to give. Learn how to be warm and open, thoughtful and caring, considerate and understanding, and others will return these favors to you, as well. Sometimes it takes a spark to start a fire. Show the initiative and be open first; don't wait for someone else to do it. Don't live in anticipation of the world around you. Make your own life happen.

Find out what you're good at, and do it well. Know and understand both your strengths and weaknesses. Don't be afraid to admit either of them, and don't try to fool yourself into believing that you can ignore either. You can paint a tiger black, hiding his stripes, but he will always have claws and teeth. He can learn to control or use those to his benefit, but he IS always going to be a tiger!

The older you get, the more you should know about yourself. Incorporate it into your life, your thinking, your actions, and your reactions. Know your strengths and weaknesses, and you will be able to work with or past them.

I don't really know that things happen for a reason. But I do know that everything that happens leads us to where we are. We build upon all our past experiences, both good and bad, as they make us into who we are.

Life Lessons

Things I've learned, or things I believe, that make life easier when kept in mind:
- Never expect a guy to change. If you're not happy with him the way he is, you'll never be happy with him. He won't change, and it's unfair to expect him to. Get used to this and accept it, or move on, while you still have time to decide.
- There is always a silver lining, if you make one. Focusing on what's positive instead of what's negative helps make life less stressful.
- Different is good. There's a definitely a line between different, and just plain weird.
- Listen to your instincts. You have them for a reason. They're almost always right. And you can never learn to trust them if you don't start trying at some point!

Things I've learned about Me that help me understand myself:
- I am different. And not just different, just like everybody else... who always somehow end up being exactly the same, in trying to be different. I don't try to be, I just am. It doesn't jive with everyone and I prefer it that way.
- I prefer smaller more personal groups of friends rather than large social groups.
- Always keep these in the medicine cabinet, and I'll be good to go: advil, neosporin, eyedrops, and lots of bandaids.
- Never put a perm in my hair again.
- Always do things, or at least make a note, when I'm thinking about it. Later I'll be far too busy or distracted or will have moved on to something else and won't remember!

What kind of person are you?

What kind of person are you?

Drive, or be driven?

Grab hold of the reigns and take control, or let the horse drag you along?

I guess you get the point already. But can you really compare these examples to your life, or to you as a person in your everyday way of dealing with life and its situations? Or how about your overall life, and the direction in which it is heading? I used to be the kind of person who just lived life, taking whatever may come. When I grew up, I realized that life doesn't come to you. You have to go and get it.

If you want something... really, really want something... you have to set your goals on it and decide what steps lie between you and your goal, and take them, one at a time. Noone can do it for you, and you will probably never accomplish that goal unless you keep it in sights.

You have to be happy with you before anyone else can ever be expected to be. You can easily have control and direction, confidence and ... well, I suppose just self-esteem in general, if you just make a decided effort. You can do all of these things without arrogence, spite, or other undesirable personal traits. Clarity of mind and spirit can leave you refreshed and open to new ways of thinking and understanding yourself and the world around you. Even if you don't believe in Karma in some shape, form, or fashion, it is a good practice to live by: treat others as you yourself would like to be treated, but don't ever let anyone take advantage of you.

Today's soapbox rant was brought to you by... no particular reason!