Oh no, here she goes about religious stuff

It didn't take me 30 years to decide that I never go with the default options given to me. It didn't take me this long to realize that my religious beliefs have always differed from those around me and those taught to me, and I have always questioned them, because why should the first thing I'm taught in life necessarily be the correct thing? Only people who have a narrow frame of mind, who never realize they have -- and can take -- the initiative to branch out in their thoughts, imho, stick to the defaults. Either that, or they just don't really care for whatever reason. It's different if you explore the possibilities of your options, and decide that something really is right for you.

But that's not what's happened for me. My parents sent me to a Baptist church. It didn't take me long to feel that I couldn't possibly stay bound to the title of "Baptist." "Christian" seemed more appropriate. There is a lot I have thought about through the years as I drifted in and out of things, and that I have recently wrote about to myself that I finally decided I had thought about for long enough, put together enough opinions, and etc., that I couldn't live with my old title anymore, either, as loosely as attached to it as I was. There was no particular action, thought, or other prompt that has lead me to this path. In fact, I find it really frustrating when people latch onto something just because it sounded cool, someone they know did, or it's the next best thing to come along. I feel that you really have to pool together all your resources and come to the culmination of your beliefs: the ones that you feel in your heart, and know in your mind, to be true and right for you.

And I don't know if I am ready to be bound by a new label. But then again, why does anyone seek out their beliefs, if not to put their energies into them and focus on them? "Physical form is ephemeral, and a basic religious impulse is to seek the permanent which is unaffected by change."